Summer holidays are the best!

I am so lucky, I now only work during term time. So I get to have 5 whole weeks off with my 3 little rascals!

We are a little over half way in and we have had some lovely days. We have been to some workshops that have been either free or rather cheap at local places. Today was pirate Lego making. 

I took Marley and my nephew, Cole along with my partner and his son. They are all similar ages so was a good boys day which promoted working as a team as well as individual little projects. The boys all seemed to really enjoy it! 

We have also been to messy play workshops where the children have potato printed onto material and then turned the material into little bags! Such a sweet idea. 

It’s been so nice to see the older girls enjoy the little things and being creative and silly again. School really does seem to have an effect on them which makes them act older than their years. Now I feel like I have children again instead of mini teenagers, I definatly have to keep on top of the activities that keep them creative and young. 

Kx

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A tidy person in a messy persons body..

Do you ever feel like you need to get more organisation in your life but things feel so hectic you don’t know where to start? That’s how I’m feeling right now too.

But I’ve decided I need to make a start. I saw a Instagram post and a lady had started just by setting herself a room or 2 in the house per day along with a job you always plan to get round to but never quite get there. Keeping your paperwork in some kind of order for example.

I thought this was a good idea as most days of the week I find myself doing pretty much all of the same things and not getting round sorting through cupboards and boxes or reorganizing as much as I would like to. I find myself faffung and riding up after the kids when really they are all more than capable to do most of it themselves. 

So, I am going to make a start. My plan is to make my way though the kitchen and the cupboard downstairs before the end of the weekend, throwing, donating or selling anything that has been left unused for a period of time. May also get to do a bit of shopping for storage solutions. Also will get the kids to do their bit.a bit of responsibility may do them good.  I am hoping that once it’s done we will find the enthusiasm to keep on top of it all. Wish doesn’t always happen I must admit. 2 out of my 3 seem to suffer with this same problem. 

I love my home I really do. I just don’t have the discipline to keep it looking it’s best all day long. Not that it’s messy or dirty, more lived in. I feel that if I had more routine that I would become better at having the best of both… or is that unrealistic? I am unsure. 

I am totally open to suggestions, hints and tips… please help! 

Kx

Be kind to yourself.

This is something i have always found tricky. Especially since becoming a mother (almost 10 years ago now. Scary thought!) I know what people mean when they say this sentence to you but if it doesnt come naturally to you, how do you do it? Im not really one for regular beauty treatments, i lack style in most ways. Yes, when it comes to my children and my home i find it easy, but if you lack in self confidence and self worth, how do you make that grow? I believe i read that it takes 60-90 days to make something a new habit. Do any of us have enough patience and motivation to force a new habit when the regular day stuff feels like such a chore?

I am going to give it a good go. I am going to try doing abit of yoga each day, just and home watching youtube or something. Ive read this is good for anxiety. I am going to drink more water, eat more balanced meals. Try and find things that i personally enjoy, like going for walks, reading a book, shopping, cooking, baking… whatever it may be. Im going to find it. 

Any hints or tips and ideas are very welcome!! Help! Kx

A little lost.

For the past month now i have been battling the worst depression and anxiety i have experienced in many many years. Sometimes i feel like i am loosing my mind. Just the other day i decided to have an earlier night as i havent been sleeping well for a while now. So, i was lay in bed and it must have been a cold night as the heating clicked itself on. Well that was it, that alone set off the anxiety trigger, all of a sudden i doubting that i had double checked all windows and doors were locked, convinced myself someone would come in to the house during the night.. wait a minute, whats that noise? Im sure i heard foot steps down stairs. I search under the bed for my daughters old crutches and slowly creep down stairs, crutch in hand looking and checking everywhere was safe and locked before heading back to bed, almost running up the stairs like i was in a horror movie being chased by some kind of scary something and kept that crutch by my side for the rest of the night, but while all this was going on a little part of me knew i was being silly and was telling myself off for acting like a fool. There was me, the only one who knew but yet i felt embarrassed and ashamed, i felt like i was being a drama queen but at the same time still terrified of the fact that it could actually happen. 

This was jus one small example of what goes through my mind at times. Anxiety attacks when im out in public are becoming more regular. The thought of work panics me from the minute a work day finishes until the next arrives. 

I cant live like this. This isnt me. Though i need to accept it is now part of me. And thats not easy. 

I need to learn, learn about anxiety and its triggers, learn different ways of coping, find the ways that suit me. I need to learn how to be kind to myself and to truely believe its not a selfish act. I need to learn how to enjoy all the people and things i have around me. I know how lucky i am. But i want to really believe it from deep down and really be truely happy and comfortable in my own skin. Where to start? Kx